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You did. I knew that. Your love was the most true and the most pure that I have ever known. I wanted to love you, but did not know what love is, or how to love.
You did, possibly. You might be correct in regarding that as the root cause. But in the mystery of it all, it is not that simple. Other things stood in the way, as you were and are aware. Forces that kept my love from coming out and reaching you, and all the other environmental factors.
Your love and my love are only two forces; powerful forces indeed. They might have the almost infinite potential we dream about, but they're minor in comparison to all the universe's energy. Love does not exist along a vector, like velocity or mass. It is quite subjective single wants real sex San Francisco California to put a physical measurement on a spiritual energy or emotion, and weigh it against another of the same intangible substance, when both energies were not fully conveyed to ourselves or to the other. Surely they had weight or charged a space of some sort. In other dimensions.
Passive aggressiveness is not love, and we were both guilty of that. I understand that your silence is and was much more than that and I do not blame you for anything.
Believing that your love was greater is a subjective belief and its truth is for no human to know. Holding back because you loved me more, or you thought you did, is understandable. It would better be described as worry, not holding back, and not love. You worried and I worried about more than just whose love was "greater." A tree does not have just one root. Neither does the absence of love in an atmosphere where it is longed for.
The anonymity and mystery here provide both answers and questions. Whether or not you are the person I think you might be, and whether the person you are writing to has read your postings, let alone if it is me or not, is unknown. We might be one and the other. You might not be her and I might not be him. If you are her, then you probably recognize it is me, and I have willingly revealed myself. If you have engaged in conversations here before, in this same manner, you were not speaking with me.
There are answers too. Regardless of who we are, our spirits are aligned in similar situations; both missing the other, both seeking answers, both seeking questions, and both seeking no more questions or answers.
When all is said and done, yes - you did love me more. That is a truth I will not deny. It could have been the sole root cause. I would accept that.
Solving the mystery is an adventure. But it can not compare to the ecstasy of emptiness. Emptiness does not mean separateness. Together, we revelled in the acceptance of the mystery. That is what got us hooked. South Asian male looking for married Asian woman. any fun sexy ladys around Portland.
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